I've been the Community Troll for kind of a ridiculously long time now, if you think about it. And hell, I was pretty great at it for a good long while, maybe even a couple of years. I'm sure there's a lot I could say about how nice it's been to have an outlet to relieve stress and overall pissyness, but really I have no interest in writing up some kind of twenty page long document about just how much of a blast it's been being the biggest [derriere orifice] on campus. But trust me, it was a hell of a time. This has been a place I could come to and just [m'kay] let it go, a place where if I saw someone acting like a complete dumbass I could point at them and list about five hundred reasons just why they shouldn't even bother breathing anymore. But recently, as i'm sure you've all seen, that's changed - and it's probably not for the reasons you think.
I'm just not angry anymore. I know it might seem like the opposite, like i'm just so filled with impotent rage that I can't do anything but let loose a few swear words and stamp my feet, but i'm telling the god's honest truth here. I'm not in a terrible quasi-relationship anymore, i'm done with the emotional drama [poo] that was the last four years of high school, and for once in my life i'm completely in the driver's seat. Every time I used to come on here and post some four paragraph long dissection of just how ridiculously stupid someone was, that was me cutting loose after days of pretending to be someone I wasn't, doing things I didn't feel like doing, and all around being a complete doormat to everyone around me. That frustration, that raw vitriol, that's what kept me actually funny. It's pretty hard to actually be mad enough to cut someone down for posting on an internet forum without having a bunch of petty [poo] building up, and for once in my life I can safely say that isn't happening any time soon.
I've lost forty pounds in the past 3 months, i'm more fit than i've ever been in my life, and in less than a year i'll finally be moving away from the house that pretty much my entire immediate family aside from my grandfather has died in. I hang out with actual friends on a regular basis, rather than the old ones I had when I wanted to be a "cool kid" who let me tag along once in a while out of pity, and we have a hell of a time doing the nerdiest [poo] imaginable. For example, I just spent the entirety of last night playing Civ 5 hotseat with some of my best friends. I didn't go out partying, I didn't get wasted as hell, I just sat down and had a nice time with some fun guys. That's something I haven't ever even imagined doing in the past couple of years, and every little thing like that's been building up and completely draining me of my will to just ruin the hell out of someone's day.
So I guess that's pretty much it. I'm not a good troll anymore, I recognize that, and honestly i'm kind of tired of just phoning it in. And really, i'd rather not end up like an even more pathetic variation of a washed up child actor. To everyone in the past couple of months that i've just kind of annoyed with my half-hearted attempts at trolling, sorry about that. I won't really be trying again unless [poo] actually starts going south once more (approximately once I actually move and realize life is more complicated than I think), so I guess all you kiddies can rest easy for a while. Oh, and Hadrian? Sorry for bringing up that website thing again earlier.
But don't even deny that that [poo] was [m'kay] classic.
Regular Community Jackoff,
Nargotah